The Verbal Assassin
Last year, more
as a joke than anything, I speculated what would come of us in 2005.
I included many humorous "predictions" like Angelina Jolie
falling for me (Sorry, Angelina, I found someone better) and I didn't
think much of it until the more serious prophetic tellings started coming
While my most dire
predictions did not occur, thankfully, like a dirty bomb attack on the
U.S. and a slew of large earthquakes along the West Coast, I did manage
to foretell a discovery to drastically reduce cancer cases and that
Israel wouldn't pull all the way out of it's Gaza settlements. Also,
there was the discovery of a planet beyond Pluto and the presidential
assassination attempt. The US~Observer did "win" a big case
involving Vietnam Swift Boat Vet Tedd Peck whose charges of filing false
tax returns were discovered to come from none other than John Kerry
who was under fire by the "Swifties" for falsely claiming
his first Purple Heart. The charges were filed when Peck refused to
"back off" during Kerry's bid to be our president in 2004.
And then there were the things that were talked about in 2005 that backed
the predictions, like Taiwan President Chen Shui-bian making statements
that he would pursue Taiwan independence from China at the end of the
year, as well as announcements that commercial spaceflight would soon
be off the ground.
So, this year rather
than being "funny" I'm going to stay more serious and put
due attention toward a year I feel is going to be one of the most dynamic
in modern times.
I've also chosen
to ask random individuals for their 2006 predictions. They range from
the impossibly hilarious to the sincerely optomistic and are included
Now to get on with
it ... Hmmmm ... 2006.
The country will be awakened to the severity of our Mexican border issue
when an armed conflict will take several American lives. The public
will increase its pressure on the admiistration to put an end to the
Along with more pounding hurricanes, the country will face an increase
in all weather related destruction. From one of the biggest tornado
seasons on record that will stretch beyond "tornado alley"
to a bitter cold at the end of the year that will cripple most of the
The Bird Flu will genetically alter and begin to infect other livestock.
One step closer to the pandemic many experts fear.
Iran will back down at the last minute and take the Russian offer of
uranium enrichment. This, however, will be done to hide what the security
council will find to be their fully active nuclear arms program.
With this discovery, the International Atomic Energy Agency will recommend
sanctions on Iran in the U.N. Security Council. Once sanctions are in
place expect Iran to become hostile.
The quest to track down Bigfoot in Malaysia will be successful and the
discovery and capture of this ape-like creature will herald Bigfoot
fever in the United States to catch their own.
Another discovery regarding cancer will begin to give scientists the
tools to prevent all types. Possibly something on the genetic level.
Like a retro-virus that would go in and rearrange genes to be cancer-free.
Are we really alone in this universe? That answer just might be made
public this year. Through releases by a government agency, or through
actually verifiable contact.
Israel will become the target of Iran's weapons program. Israel will
retaliate and the entire region will be plunged into a chaotic fighting
With this dynamic political atmosphere and split in the United States
the largest amount of young voters will hit the voting booths this year.
This will also be due in part to more political presence by campaigns
on the world wide web.
Unfortunately, I have to restate my earthquake predictions. I can feel
it coming. Don't worry, I won't keep doing this every year ...
- Expect a 6.9
to hit Southern California.
- To the Northeast
near Qualeys Camp, NV (East of Mammoth Lakes) a 7.2 tremblor is heading
your way and the caldera will heat up significantly.
- From San Francisco
North to Eureka, CA expect moving and shaking of 6.7 to 7.
- Farther to the
North, Portland, OR will be hit by a 6.2 and Seattle, WA will be displaced
by a 7.1.
- Alaska will
erupt in further volcanic activity and the Aleutian Island Chain will
be the site of the largest registered quake in recent history at magnitude
- Please lookout
for our own Tsunami along the Pacific Northwest.
Due in part to the financial burden of weather and natural disaster
destruction and the escalated costs in our military endeavors look for
a serious downturn in the U.S. economy. Also, because of Iran's issues,
look for the price of gas to spike this summer over $5.00 per gallon.
Lucky 13 ... Heroes will reemerge in our American culture as many will
go above and beyond to help their fellow man.
NASA will once again suffer a mishap and unfortunately lives will be
lost. This will call into question the entire space program until "contact"
fervor hits and NASA will roll-out it's new spacecraft. Look for more
private spaceflight companies to emerge.
Something will happen with Air Force One.
Our forces will be split by an Asian military threat.
The administration will push through community service legislation requiring
each citizen to serve it's country.
Brad and Angelina's baby will be herald as the "perfect" baby.
Imagine that. (Sorry, I had to ...)
Osama will be found but will narrowly escape, once again calling into
question the ability of our intelligence agencies to do anything other
than spy on the public.
Taken from my favorite book, Illusions: the Adventures of a Reluctant
Messiah, my final prediction is that everything written here "could
Whatever the outcome
of 2006, just remember to focus on the truly important things in life
- love, family, belief, laughter, smiles, friendships, and the millions
of wonderful moments that make up our lives.
what other "see":
I predict Bush will remain above 40% in the polls even though the truth
about the crimes he committed while in office become clear. The hurricane
season this year will be the worst in recorded history and the current
U.S. government will have to begin talks about the reality of global
warming. Iran will maintain their nuclear program after indirectly threatening
to cut off oil supply to the world. And last but not least, one more
terrorist attack on U.S. soil.
al-Qaeda will surrender.
Political and social unrest due to the falling dollar (therefore higher
prices), the continuing expansion of fascism and gold will hit $5,000.00
There will be an attempt to overthrow the Vatican by a group of flamingo
ninjas, but will be foiled by Russian Orthodox nuns on magic carpets.
Mariah Carey will come out with, yet again, another #1 hit.
International warfare and relations will become more intense forcing
us to either take a step forward or fall apart completely. I feel that
this gray area can't continue.
The release of Halo 3 for the XBox which is to coincide with the release
of the Playstation 3 gaming console will damage Playstation sales and
successfully thwart Sony's bid to remain the top gaming console.
It has to be a good year! ... If I remain positive everything will be
alright for me.
Misty has something and all of this could just lead us down the path
of self fulfilling our worst prophecies. So, all my best to you and
yours in this new year. It will be great!
About the Author:
Ron Lee has been a freelance and published writer since 1985. He attended
Richmond University in London where he focused on theatre arts, and
the University of Nevada Reno where he dual majored in criminal justice
and psychology. He currently spends his time helping the US~Observer's
clients with his no nonsense investigative reporting style. Ron may
be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Favorite quote, "The truth shall make you free." --John VIII. 32